The The Rustic Frog

Okay, I just got back from the trashiest white trash bar I've ever been to, granted, I haven't been to that many white trash bars. I had planned to go to Kelsey's for karaoke with Chris (from the box office) and some of his (I learned later) high school friends. Unfortunately, Kelsey's hasn't had karaoke for a while and Velocity magazine (in case there was any doubt) sucks because it listed it as a location for karaoke tonight. So we found a Leo which listed The Rustic Frog as an alternate place for singing. Chris warned me it was trashy, but dear lord! Here are some of the highlights:

There was a banner hung on the outside of the building which said, "Welcome to the The Rustic Frog." When I pointed out that there was an extra article in the sign, Christ told me not to say the word "article" there.

There was a waitress in a bikini trying to sell shots in test tubes to the tables of beer-drinking rednecks.

One of the best songs of the evening was a rendition of Redneck Woman. For those of you who don't know, the chorus begins, "I'm a Redneck Woman, I'm no high class broad..." Chris's friend Alana (and every woman in the bar except for me) knew every word and sang along.

The karaoke host took a song for himself. It was the Dukes of Hazard theme song.

There was a couple making out/woman giving a lap dance at the table full of people next to our booth. This was made especially interesting by the one woman at that table who clearly disapproved of what was going on.

Chris wouldn't sing any showtunes with me (even though that's all he listens to) because he assumed he'd be drown in the Ohio when then figured out he's gay.

When I went to settle up with the bartender, she showed me my tab and asked if I just wanted to see it because it was $6.75 and there was a $10 minimum. Did she think I'd leave my card and come back tomorrow for 2 more beers so she could run my card?

The "parking lot" was gravel with what Chris called "festival parking" (i.e. there were no spaces, we just parked in a line behind the last row of cars). And on the walk in, I said, "I probably shouldn't order a Cosmo here." Chris answered, "Only if by 'Cosmo' you mean 'Bud Light.'"

Anyway, I had so much fun! I only wish I'd listed my second song first because I didn't get to sing my second song. And I'm really hungry--I wish I'd eaten more for dinner...